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The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children | 
enlarge | Author: Ross W. Greene Category: Book
List Price: $14.00 Buy New: $13.22 You Save: $0.78 (6%)
New (10) Used (12) from $6.58
Avg. Customer Rating: 154 reviews Sales Rank: 54578
Format: Bargain Price Media: Paperback Edition: 2nd Number Of Items: 1 Pages: 336 Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.5 Dimensions (in): 7.9 x 5 x 0.9
ASIN: B000ENWIFS
Publication Date: January 23, 2001 Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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Amazon.com Flexibility and tolerance are learned skills, as any parent knows if they've seen an irascible 2-year-old grow into a pleasant, thoughtful, and considerate older child. Unfortunately, for reasons that are poorly understood, a few children don't "get" this part of socialization. Years after toddler tantrums should have become an unpleasant memory, a few unlucky parents find themselves battling with sudden, inexplicable, disturbingly violent rages--along with crushing guilt about what they "did wrong." Medical experts haven't helped much: the flurry of acronyms and labels (Tourette's, ADHD, ADD, etc.) seems to proffer new discoveries about the causes of such explosions, when in fact the only new development is alternative vocabulary to describe the effects. Ross Greene, a pediatric psychologist who also teaches at Harvard Medical School, makes a bold and humane attempt in this book to cut through the blather and speak directly to the (usually desperate) parents of explosive children. His text is long and serious, and has the advantage of covering an enormous amount of ground with nuance, detail, and sympathy, but also perhaps the disadvantage that only those parents who are not chronically tired and time-deprived are likely to get through the entire book. Quoted dialogue from actual sessions with parents and children is interspersed with analysis that is always oriented toward understanding the origins of "meltdowns" and developing workable strategies for avoidance. Although pharmacological treatment is not the book's focus, there is a chapter on drug therapies. --Richard Farr
Book Description We've all seen them: children who explode when they're told to do something or when things don't go their way. The ones who completely lose control and become verbally and physically aggressive. Spoiled, stubborn, manipulative children. Right? Not so fast. These labels suggest that the behavior if such children is planned and intentional, and popular reward-and-punishment strategies are typically used to teach and motivate them to behave more appropriately. But for a significant number of these children, the standard approach doesn't always work. Such children are easily frustrated and extremely inflexible. They get "stuck" over seemingly simple requests, benign issues, and sudden changes in plans. They may be very anxious, irritable, and volatile. They may have difficulty telling you what they're frustrated about or thinking through potential solutions to problems. In clinical terms, they may be diagnosed with any of a variety of psychiatric disorders, including oppositional-defiant disorder, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), Tourette's disorder, depression, and bipolar disorder. If this sounds like your child, you're probably feeling frustrated, overwhelmed, guilt-ridden, exhausted, and hopeless. Now there is a new way for you, your child, and your entire family to find help. In this groundbreaking new book, Dr. Ross Greene, a child psychologist at Massachusetts General Hospital and Harvard Medical School, makes a compassionate argument that the difficulties of these children stem from developmental deficits in two critical skills: flexibility and frustration tolerance. He asserts that if such children could do well, they would. Drawing upon recent advances in the neuroscience, Dr. Greene describes the factor that contribute to "inflexible-explosive" behavior in children and why the strategies that work for most children aren't as effective for inflexible-explosive children. Then, with the help of "snapshots" from the lives of children, parents, and teachers with whom he has worked over the years, Dr. Greene lays out a sensitive, practical, effective, systematic approach to helping these children at home and school, including: reducing hostility and antagonism between the child and adult anticipating situations in which the child is most likely to explode creating an environment in which explosions are less likely to occur focusing less on reward and punishment and more on communication and collaborative problem-solving helping the child develop the self-regulation and thinking skills to be more flexible and handle frustration more adaptively In Explosive Child, you'll find ways to regain your sanity and optimism and rebuild the confidence to handle your child's difficulties completely and lovingly. With Dr. Greene's compassionate, expert advice and insight, you and your child will rediscover newfound hope and a relationship you can both feel good about.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 149 more reviews...
Confusing and Unhelpful August 24, 2008 1 out of 2 found this review helpful
I was very disappointed in this book. There was never any clear discussion of what symptoms or characteristics one might use to classify their child as "explosive" other than one who throws a lot of violoent fits. But there is a big difference between a "difficult" kid and one who is emotionally incapable of controlling him- or herself.
Also, the book devolves quickly into doc-speak, bandying terms like "separation of affect," "working memory" and "shifting cognitive set" which had me seeing stars. It's almost like you need to be a psychologist to even begin to understand what the author is talking about.
From the ratings, it appears that many others have found this book to be helpful. But it left me frustrated and confused.
A great book to better understand the stressed child July 26, 2008 1 out of 1 found this review helpful
Dr. Greene does a superb job of describing the temperamentally stressed child. He lets the reader know that the explosive child is wired in such a way that life stresses him/her easily and strategies to help don't come easily.
As the adults, be we parents or caretakers, we need to realize that children don't spend their days pondering how to make our lives miserable. These children are miserable and looking to us to teach them strategies to feel better.
Dr. Greene's book builds on the books on temperament such as "The Difficult Child" and "Raising Your Spiritual Child". He gives us a deeper understanding of the emotional consequences of temperamental mismatch. He then also has a program to help us help our children to become the boss of their emotions.
If one hasn't seen one of his workshops, I would also recommend you go. Hearing is definitely another way of absorbing the intent and knowledge that he offers.
Great Book, Big Help! June 21, 2008 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
I loved this book. I have to say I was skeptical at first, as I felt the author was talking down to the reader, however, I was being over sensitive. As the mother of an adhd child, often a person gets over sensitive to percieved criticism when none is really there. Anyway, this book opened a whole new view for me on my child's behavior and the basic reasons behind it. At last I saw why conventional behavior modification (token economies, loss of privileges, etc) didn't work and I saw what would work. I found this book the most helpful thing I've tried in years. I would highly recomend this book to anyone dealing with an explosive child.
Higest Marks.
Very informative read. June 3, 2008 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children
So far for us, this has been a great learning experience. But it is far from over. We are learning to communicate better and more effectively for all of our benefits. We aim to have a more loving and peaceful home with the help of this book.
An excellent book for parents of all children April 28, 2008 1 out of 1 found this review helpful
A must for all educators, professionals and parents who either have or work with children. Gives an overview of the varied assortment of issues many children have to deal with, and guides the reader in a clear and concise fashion in how to deal with a "short-tempered" child.
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