Customer Reviews: Read 68 more reviews...
 Book Review July 23, 2008
The book came super fast, within a few days! Book was in the condition promised, no complaints!
I blushed and giggled at the same time July 10, 2008
This was the best book. I have never blushed and giggled so much before. This book helped me realize that it is okay to have fun in bed with your husband. The fire is there like it has never been before. My husband even made the comment that He wished he could personally thank Dr. Leman
Every newelywed couple should read this. Dr. Leman thank you for your wisdom. YOu have made my marriage come alive.
 While looking for sheet music, I found the noise very distracting. June 11, 2008
0 out of 3 found this review helpful
Dr. Kevin Lehman is a prolific author, who has appeared on a number of well-known television and radio programs. In 'Sheet Music' Dr. Leman spends a fair number of pages on the mechanics of sex, including a few anatomical diagrams. But with 'Sheet Music' I would offer several caveats for Christians to keep in mind about this book:
'Sheet Music' does not reflect an understanding of the primary authority that Scripture is intended to have for believers. Secular perspectives are commonly seen as having equal or even primary authority in comparison to Scripture.
'Sheet Music' fails to present or even assume a full biblical context for Christian life and marriage. The book assumes that Christian marriage is monogamous, but provides little to nothing more in the way of biblical support - even failing to present or make reference to biblical passages would powerfully and dramatically support the author's point! The substantially secular viewpoint reflected in this book includes:
Recommendations that draw from a secular viewpoint, omitting biblical insights
Directing Christians specifically to resources outside the local church that have a claim to expertise that lies substantially in secular qualifications, but not spiritual qualifications.
'Sheet Music' falls short of presenting or assuming the full set of biblical passages, such as:
Biblical passages that contain critical revelations from God, Who created marriage and designed sexual intimacy (including Ephesians 5:21-33; 1 Peter 3:1-7, etc.).
Biblical passages on the believer's position and condition, identification, walking in the Spirit, recognizing and dealing with the sin nature, and even basic biblical principles on topics like `anxiety' (Philippians 4:6; 1 Peter 5:7).
The difference between Law and Grace, and the huge difference it makes in all areas of life (sexual intimacy included) and even into eternity (Romans 5; 7:1-6).
By pointing believers to resources outside of the local church (counseling professionals, sexual therapy clinics, etc.) believers are then setting aside true biblical counsel within the body of Christ, much of the authority and primacy of God's word, and are telling believers to go to resources that are not grace-based, but are charging for their services (contrary to 2 Corinthians 2:17 & chapters 8, 9).
Believers are directed to the resources of this world (Galatians 6:14; Ephesians 2:1-3) and of the sin nature. With the best of intentions, believers are thereby instructed to walk according to this world's best understanding and in reliance upon the sin nature.
With the understanding that I do not recommend this book overall, here are some of the better quotes from this book:
A couple's sex life is usually a microcosm of the marriage. Every now and then a couple has a great sex life with a poor marriage, but this is the rarity, something you see only every couple of years. Page 10
You need to know that every day a woman internally asks her husband, Do you really love me? Do you really care? Page 10
What warms a woman up is when her husband helps around the house, picks up after himself, helps with the children, makes arrangements for dates, and overall cares for her. If a husband consistently and graciously does this without acting like a martyr, he's going to find, six times out of ten, that his wife is ready and eager to enjoy an active and fulfilling love life. It will be a natural response to a lifestyle of sincere affection. Page 11
Most of us men want to be our wives' heroes. Page 11
 He spares no detail! June 1, 2008
1 out of 1 found this review helpful
Wow! Dr. Leman spares no details in this one! And even after 10 years of marriage, he helped me see marriage in general and intimacy in particular in a new way. Be prepared for what society would probably deem an "old fashioned" approach to love relationships, but don't knock it till you try it... cuz it works!
If it did nothing more than remind me of how different my husband is from me (and how different our needs are) - it was worth it! It made me want to stop taking my man for granted. And who knows...it just might ignite "creativity" in the bedroom again. Thanks Dr. Leman!
 Overall, a good pick despite some offensive material May 16, 2008
3 out of 3 found this review helpful
I am getting married in a few weeks and bought this book for my fiance and I to read. I found this book to have numerous strengths: it is straightforward and detailed. I don't imagine that many readers will be confused or have more questions. Dr. Leman celebrates the sexual relationship of the married couple and paints a very healthy, though possibly counter-cultural, view of sex between a husband and a wife. And, along with this he does realistically acknowledge and thoroughly address the challenges of the sexual relationship (tiredness, kids in the next room, husbands generally wanting sex more than wives, orgasm issues, differences between men and women, the role of an emotional connection in the sexual relationship, etc.) This book was written by a Christian psychologist, so there are numerous references to Scripture, which as a Christian, I appreciated.
Despite what I see as many strengths of this book, I rarely read more than a few pages without feeling a little aggravated with Dr. Leman and what I perceive as his bent towards elevating the importance of the husband's sexual needs. First a caveat, I do believe that marriage is about sacrifice. I realize there will be many times when I may not want to have sex and I will sacrificially engage to please and love my husband well. Having said that, Dr. Leman goes a bit further than this, in my opinion. He repeatedly admonishes women to do everything they can, every time they can to please their men (unless it is degrading or morally objectionable to the woman). At one point, Dr. Leman points out that men may feel embarrassed to go buy KY jelly for the wedding night, so he recommends that women do that. It's small, but it is a perfect example of his bent. As an unmarried woman, I am not particularly at ease with the idea of buying KY jelly and condoms--why must I be the one to sacrifice at all times? At multiple places in the book, Dr. Leman suggests rather directly that if a man is having an affair, it is because his wife has not fulfilled his sexual needs. While this may be true, I feel that Dr. Leman paints an incomplete picture with this.
My final critique is that Dr. Leman advocates that both men and women masturbate both in preparation for their first sexual encounter and as a means to address various potential problems (e.g., premature ejaculation and the woman having a hard time reaching orgasm, among others). Many reading this book may not have a problem with this, but as a Christian, I think many will wonder at Dr. Leman's suggestion that we can masturbate while keeping our thoughts pure and will wonder at the seeming contradiction to his simultaneous encouragement for the husband and wife to explore and learn sexually together.
All in all, if you have no sexual experience this book is a good read. It will give you helpful and clear information. Just be aware that you will likely be offended or not agree with Dr. Leman at various points in the text.
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